For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
