So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Banned from zoo.
Again?
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
The Olympian is in my bed
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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