we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
