The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Just cropdusted the office
My cat gives me a boner
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
This house was built for laser tag.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
