and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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