it was like his penis was on wheels.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
