why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
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