im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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