just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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