got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Randomize
