Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Randomize