HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
