I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
There r osticjed everywhere
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Randomize
