Plan B is the new Plan A
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Randomize
