real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
