I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Send help, water and tortillas.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
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