just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
