Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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