that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
There's always time for handjobs
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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