it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
