youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
