does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
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