I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
We need a shit load of segways right now
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Randomize
