kristin has been a bad kristin
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Randomize
