i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
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