I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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