This is not my ceiling
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
