Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize