Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Randomize