let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Randomize
