I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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