You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize
