I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
