peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
