when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Randomize
