Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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