Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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