WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
