that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
