Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Randomize
