I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
