Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Randomize
