If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
