Nicole vs. Life
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Randomize
