so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize