So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
So gin and wine won't be happening again
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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