its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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