your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize