The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
