What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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