Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
