But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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