That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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